Martha, Meet Frank, Daniel, and Laurence
Channel Four Films 1998
The Very Thought of You
Film Four 1999
Frank: Nickie, the agent calls me up, right? She's got this French actress
coming over from Paris. She's throwing this big dinner party in her honor and she
wants me to bring Daniel, because she's read some article in some fucking magazine about
how fucking 'eligible' he is - alright?
So we get to the restaurant and this French actress is an absolute bombshell, right?
So Nickie takes ME and places me next to bombshell woman - place of honor and
conversation through the evening. And it turns out that she has got this break in
her schedule coming up the following weekend and she wants me to give her a call. So
next day I give her a call - no reply. Day after that I give her a call - no reply.
Next day Nickie phones me up to tell me that bombshell woman has gone to VENICE
with fucking Daniel! Now answer me a question. Is that the behavior of a
friend? Because I tell you - the only reason he was interested is because I was
You wanna know the truth? I HATE HIM! I hate him, he hates me! We hate
each other with the kind of commitment we only get from childhood friends.
The next time I see him I'm gonna break his nose! Break his nose and then break his
fucking jaw! JESUS CHRIST!!!
Martha: I'm Martha, by the way.
Frank: I know --- (laugh) --- yeah -- you're Martha, you're American, and you're
looking for someone that you think -- that you KNOW you're in love with. Because you
feel it right here, don't you?
Martha: Like a thunderbolt!
Frank: A thunderbolt? Right! What does that feel like, for my education?
What does that feel like, being struck by a thunderbolt?
Frank: Listen, I don't suppose you'd consider taking a coffee with a certain
Martha: They say like attracts like, right?
Frank: They do, don't they!
Frank: Where is this one in 10 million now? You've forgotten all about him
Martha: That's not true!
Frank: Yes it is. You were sitting there thinking, this man is OK! He's
better than I thought. In fact most people are attracted to just about everybody.
This perfect partner bollocks is just a physycal and chemical impossibility.
Do you know why?
Frank: My perfect partner is me.
Frank: Me - with breasts! The perfect relationship. We would like the
same food, we'd like the same music, the sex would be great!
Frank: I love this place! It's so full of hypocrites! Look at that
bloke, pretending he's interested in the paintings! Look at him!! (ha!)
Look at this one! What does that prat care about art? He read in some
magazine that this is the best pick-up joint in London, that's what he's doing here!
Frank: People come to Art Galleries for the SEX! -------There's nothing
more boring than looking at paintings! They only reason anyone ever comes to an art
gallery is to get laid!!
Frank: I've got her!! Daniel's American!! Eating out of my hand, pupils
dialating --I haven't got time for a moral discussion, Florence!! I just wanted to
someone the good news!!